Nexev's Hyper Homestuck Smut

Or Romance!

For instance somewhere in the infinite infinities Aradia sat at the Putain D'étouffement, nervously shifting in her layers of girdles, corsets, anything to squeeze herself into a medium. It was a bit much but quite frankly she had a tendency to be… intimidating. Maybe this way she could appear a bit more waifish.

Aradia checked her watch, she met this person on a online dating app Eye in the Sky and this is her first actual date with the person. She hoped it didn’t end like it did with Sollux, or Vriska… Or Tavros… or…

come to think of it, she’s had some pretty bad luck. Probably because she was so heavy.

“Excuse me, are you Aradia?”

Aradia looked down to see a rather short waif of a woman, with a small bob cut on her hair, she would have been androgynous if males were a thing in this setting.

Aradia nodded at the wide eyed girl. “That is me, whats the matter little girl.”

Kanaya frowned. “Um.. actually I’m Kanaya. Your date.”

“Oh.” Aradia tried to hide her shock. “Well feel free to take your seat.”

Normally Kanaya would be offended by the little girl comment, but she was a bit distracted, her date was huge. For one thing the ram dwarfed the girl by a good 2 feet. But mostly it was the curves. Aradia’s breasts were bigger than her head, even if they were hidden by a sweater. Kanaya was feeling rather self conscious in front of the amazoness. Kanaya took her seat, shifting to had the glowing lump between her legs.

Aradia in the meanwhile ran her fingers across her bindings, making sure the lacing were still secure while trying to pass up the check up as a idle scratch. She was so cute, it was like a little teddy bear. She just wanted to pick her up and…

“Madams?” A rather cool voice interrupted the twos. A pair of horned rimmed glasses were adjusted as a six armed waiter loomed over the two. “If you two are not sure what to order I can return later?” Vriska glanced at the larger of the pair, the fairy was classic uptown but the other looked familiar, and certainly somewhat out of place at this high end establishment.

Aradia couldn’t help but notice the staring and glanced at the waitress, the staff adverting her eyes immediately, her poster was in the 10 digits at this point, it would be bad if she got ID.

“Ah, well then I would like the surf and slurp.” Aradia said, indicating a thick oyster stew served with beef kebabs for dipping.

“Um… I’ll have the Swordfish steak atop the Celery and Pineapple salad.” Kanaya said.

Vriska nodded and walked away, the orders listed on her pad.

She recognized the maroon blood, she’d have to move soon lest the Crew blew her cover.

“So… “ Aradia started. “Gotta wonder why you asked someone like me to go to a classy joint like this. Not that it’s not exciting, but why not a girl a bit more your standard?”

Aradia leaned forward, her confined cleavage knocking a water glass over. “Are you one of those seeking to tame the wild beauty? Did you watch Pretty Harlot to often?”

Kanaya looked down at her dish, doing her best to not look like she was ogling her through the reflection on the plate.

Aradia was wrong, in fact it was quite the opposite, but still… Kanaya shifted in her table, she felt humiliated.

Aradia smiled. “Well hook line and sinker.”

A cough interrupted the gangster’s reverie, “Excuse me.” Vriska said, effortlessly balancing the plates on her six hands. “Your dinner is ready.”

With two loud thuds the two plates landed on the table as Vriska took her leave. Kanaya dug into her salad, eager to avoid the subject.

Aradia smiled as she swirled her kebobs in the soup, lifting the white dripping meat over her mouth.

Lets see how green this girl can blush.

Kanaya gasped as she saw Aradia eat, her wide tongue wrapping around the meat as white sauce dribbled around her. The large troll looked Kanaya straight in the eye and pushed the kabob all the way down her throat till all that was visible was the skewer, a large slurping sounds audible as she pulled and pushed the kebob back in.

And then with a large gulp Aradia withdrew the now clean skewer a trail of drool dribbling from the end of the skewer as she stared straight at Kanaya’s eyes, smiled, and winked.

A large thump sound was heard, followed by the large clatter of dishes falling to the floor.

Aradia paused, narrowly managing to grab the oyster so

... more on the forums ...