Funny Ending - People's reaction to a Sperm Sample

Story by Pr0n_Glutton

I came across this hilarious story in a "Other Fetishes" section of the Cum on Food story. I seemed a bit TL-DR when I was looking for other short posts in the sections, but I'm glad I read it because the ending was funny as hell. I'll copy it just in case the link dies or something.

http://www.cumonfood.net/forum/other-strange-fetish-discussions/a-sperm-sample-t308.0.html

I thought some of you might enjoy hearing about the following incident from my dim and distant past. It is related to cum play, but nothing to do with food.

Several years ago I had a spell of 6 months during which I needed to visit my doctor on a regular basis for monitoring. On one of the early visits I had to take a urine sample with me in one of those tubular bottles, about 4 inches long by an inch in diameter and made of clear plastic. I found this to be rather embarrassing, carrying it with me in the waiting room and then handing it over to the doctor when I was called in to her office.

Anyway, thinking about this in the waiting room one day, it gave me an idea, so I decided to try and have a little fun during my visits http://www.cumonfood.net/forum/Smileys/default/smiley.gif

I partially filled the sample tube with water and then jerked off, shooting my cum in to the container. The water kept it looking nice, white and fresh; suspended as thick streams of sperm.

I headed off to the doctors with my fresh sample and I sat next to two ladies who were deep in conversation. I had my sample bottle in my hand and I kept it hidden from general view of the room, while making it clearly visible to the two ladies near me. I know they were intrigued by it, from the strange and quizzical looks that they gave each other, but they never said anything. I discovered from several such visits that this was the typical reaction. I'm sure they guessed what it was but didn't want to say anything!

There were however a couple of notable exceptions. The first one was rather awkward because the lady I sat next to appeared to be alone when I arrived and then her daughter returned from the play area. She would have been about 4 years old and like all children was keen to ask lots of questions. She noticed I was holding something and asked me what it was. Her mother, judging by the look on her face, clearly knew what it was and just told her daughter to "stop bothering the man and go and play". But she kept asking questions and I respected the way that this mother managed to avoid any really difficult answers. As she left to go for her appointment, the mother whispered to me that she was sorry for her daughters questioning and hoped that I had not found it too awkward.

The best time however was at an early evening appointment. I had taken a seat opposite a middle aged lady who was reading a magazine when I arrived. I positioned my sample bottle towards her so that she could easily see the long strings of cum in the bottle and I kept a sideways watch to see if she was looking.

After I had been sat there a couple of minutes, I was certain that she had seen what I was holding. Then the lady totally surprised me by leaning forward towards me and asking me "Is that what I think it is?" and nodding to the bottle I was holding. I was lost for words and as I had not answered her, she asked again "Is that a sperm sample?"

I confirmed that it was and said no more, just watching her response. The conversation then went something like this:

Lady: Why on earth would a young man such as you need to provide a sperm sample?

Me: I'm bringing it for testing by the nurse.

The Lady now had a really strange look on her face, kind of like puzzled and turning her nose up as if to indicate "yuck" at the same time.

Lady: So who does that then? One of the nurses you say?

Me: Yes, it's just part of her job.

Lady: I'm glad I'm not a nurse!

There was then a lengthy pause, but she continued to lean toward me and look at my sperm in the bottle...which I was getting quite a thrill from watching her now. Then she stunned me again.

Lady: I can't believe it. I mean, sure I don't mind tasting my husbands cum and I've swallowed plenty of his as well as that of several previous boyfriends, but to have to taste a patient's sperm...what can the nurse tell from tasting it?

I then realised that when I said it was for "testing by the nurse" she thought I had said it was for "tasting by the nurse". I repeated that it was for TESTING and we both had a good laugh.

She suddenly looked very embarrassed, remembering her confession about swallowing sperm no doubt, and so I asked her what she thought a nurse would be able to tell by tasting it? She replied with a smile and simply said "nothing, other than whether or not she liked it".

She was then called in for her appointment and that was the end of our conversation.